I’m writing after a short break. I wasn’t well for a bit… as they say now a days “I’ve been a bit under the weather”. I don’t get it… what’s wrong with saying I’m not feeling well? It’s the new IN way of saying. Doesn’t it sound too English? Like how the Brits would say it? Just say na I’m not feeling well. Under the weather sounds like I’m talking to an Angrez. Blah blah blah….

Ya…. so I wasn’t well. After P, it was A’s turn and then mine. So the whole week went past. Even though I wasn’t feeling that great we had a small pre anniversary dinner last night. We complete a decade this month end :)) my sister in law organised and the girls (I mean P and her cousin) put up a small show for us. Choreographed by her older cousin. It was so sweet. Adorable girls they all. Mwah! 

Since it was a very last minute plan, P dint know what to give me coz she wasn’t prepared. So she tore a small patterned paper and made a quick card and took a picture ,which she had coloured last week, and made a stand for it and gifted it. It’s for me to use in my room as a show piece and keep it on my dressing table. (It’s still incomplete but I guess she dint get the time to complete it)

Her cousins were here for about 20 days but they get so attached to each other. After they left , P was supposed to go to her friends house to play (another new word for it is ‘playdate’) but she refused to go. She was so upset that she just don’t want to go! Ultimately I thought I must cheer her up and took her for a movie Despicable Me 3. It’s really worth a watch. Even though it’s the third in the series it was still so entertaining. 

So now it’s back to sleeping on time and doing things on time. We were just rushing through the past 20 days. Not getting enough sleep and doing homework at bed time. I guess we will all settle in our routine now… until next time. These kids just can’t get enough of each other!

P was down with a bad bout of indigestion on Saturday. Was vomiting out even water. So obviously no junk and no outside food for a couple of days. Yesterday we took all the kids to cubbon park. Surprisingly very less crowd despite the lovely weather. It was just perfect for a day at the park. Her cousin wanted to eat popcorn and candy floss but P knew she isn’t supposed to have any. So 1 popcorn is all she ate (by 1 I mean only 1 piece from her cousins popcorn box). 

It’s amazing how she always understands these things and doesn’t get tempted. Whether it’s avoiding sweets and coloured ice creams for her cough to brushing her teeth every night without fail to prevent cavities. She makes sure she does it even if I forget. 

For that matter even A understands so much! The minute I tell her I’m going to office, she doesn’t insist on coming with me. She simply gives me a smile and says bye mamma. Obviously she doesn’t know what office is but somehow she has a picture that if mamma is going to office I must say bye and let her go. We go to drop P at the bus stop everyday. As she sees the bus going away she will say ” Anu badi ho jayegi , to Anu bhi school chali jayegi. Anu bus mein jayegi air aap Anu ko bye bol dena. ”

We tend to underestimate our kids so many times. We think they are too small to know or be responsible. But truly they will amaze you if given an opportunity. Explaining and talking really helps. We managed to get P out of her thumb sucking habit by just talking to her. Although I don’t know how much that’s going to help with A. Time will tell. But just hoping it will work the same for her too. Try making them responsible for something and see how they manage. When we were having a staff shortage at home I had given P 2-3 tasks that she must do every evening. Initially I had to remind her but gradually she got into the habit and did it everyday so enthusiastically. 

After the age of 6 kids are old enough to help with basic chores. If you live in a household with no or little help you can easily involve your children to help you. Lay the table, keep the clothes , arrange the sofas properly, remove the flowers from the Puja room and anything that you can think of. 

As the rain poured down today the kids broke into little squeals of laughter. P had just come back from school and was still in her uniform. Excitedly she came up to me and said can I get wet a little? I still have to change my clothes. So off she went to drench herself in the downpour. 

She splashed in the muddy puddles and danced around in the rain happily. I asked her to wear a shower cap coz it had become pretty cold and I din’t want her to catch it. She happily agreed coz at least she was getting to wet herself. After some splashing and dancing she went in to change. But it wasn’t over there. She wanted more! So her cousin and she got pots and pans from their pretend play and placed it in the rain to make a fountain! (In the pic) They even placed a small sieve on top saying the water will get filtered. They created a simple fountain with cascading water and a filteration system 😀. And they were so happy with it. 

These little things give kids so much joy. More than any expensive toy would give them. I still remember when A was born I bought a really expensive doll house for P as a gift. I thought she would really like it because she loves pretend play. But she lost interest in it so soon that I was a little annoyed also. I kept feeling I spent a bomb on that toy and she doesn’t even touch it. Thankfully A enjoys playing with it now (phew!)

Instead of engaging our kids in a 100 activities I always feel free play is a better option. So many people are after academic excellence and sports excellence for their kids at this tender age, that it annoys me. Why can’t we just let them be kids! Kids are meant to play and enjoy their childhood. Not run pillar to post satisfying their parents’ ambitions! I agree there might be an art form or maybe a sport which if taught to a child from childhood will be good for them. But then limit it to that. Don’t make the poor kids run around in 10 different activities. Maybe 1 or 2 days of class in a week is necessary for those. 

This is referring to A! Omg! From the moment she wakes up till the time she goes to bed…. she must be asking a thousand questions. Who’s is this? What is this? How is this? What are you doing? Where is so and so? One after the other. Non stop! Sometimes I can carry on for a bit. Then I distract her with something and she is quiet for a while. But you know THOSE times. When you’re so tired you can’t move a muscle. Or when you have so much work at hand that you just can’t stop to reply. Those are the toughest. 

She wants to know EVERYTHING. Her curiousity just doesn’t end. So what do I do when I loose my patience? I tell her go ask papa 😄 or …. say I don’t know…. or I just let her suck her thumb. Yes….  all the good parenting blogs and books will tell you answer their questions. It builds a level of trust and gives you a good rapo with your child. You must feed their curiosity…. blah blah blah. Easier said than done! I have 2. So that makes it hundreds of questions a day! I have a capacity ok!

But sometimes P knows when I’m not in the mood (read bedtime) and she will say “mamma can I ask you one last question?” And that’s when you just can’t say no. When she looks at me with her innocent eyes and says that, the heart just melts. And I’m like “ok… just one last one 🙂”

P has taken an interest in cricket! Yes…. I never thought that would happen. She would refuse to even hold a ball when she was little. And sports dint interest her at all. But I see that her new school has changed that. I must admit, the old school where she went pre primary, had zero focus on sports. They had a namesake sports complex which was like a factory shed with lesser ventilation than needed. 

The interest cropped up during the last season of IPL. She watched a few matches with her cousin brother her age. And another cousin at Nani house increased the cricket interest with the introduction of cricket attax cards. Now she knows the Mumbai and bangalore teams pretty well and and recognise most of them by face. Today she and papa were watching the India Pak match and she squealed in excitement when Kohli or Yuvraj hit boundries. She has been after me to take her for the Sachin movie but we haven’t yet been able to. Her cricket sir in school has advised them to see the movie. So it must be done!

With this entire thing I realised that we never will know what really will interest our children and when. We assume she is a certain kind and she turns out differently! I remember discussing this with a cousin a few years back. I told P is just not interested in sports. So I know that putting her in this school might be a waste if that’s what the school is known for. And she was like Pooja just hold on. You never know what she might take up. And it’s true. 

So P came home with the news on Monday that she has been chosen the class monitor! Yay!! I was so proud of her. For her class she is the first monitor ever coz in grade 1 they dint have monitors. When I asked her what her role was, she said she has to manage the other monitors. Power monitor, line monitor, table monitor, book monitor…… 😳 I was like wow! In our times one monitor and the house leaders did everything. Here they have a monitor for everything!! Sounded pretty cool to me coz it seemed like she is the CEO of her class with other managers below her 😁

I remember a few moments which really made me proud of her before this. Like her first Kathak performance or her first performance on stage when she was in pre primary. Or when she made me a birthday card all by herself. I won’t be wrong if I say this on behalf of all other moms that the little achievements also make us feel like our children have climbed a peak! 

We were at her grade 1 school production. P was in a minion dance and so was one of her very good friend. Her parents were sitting beside us and when the performance got over we both moms were wiping our eyes and the dads was laughing at us! I guess once we are moms we can cry at the drop of a hat… dam those hormones! But sometimes we can be the stronger one too. It gives us moms some greater inner strength in the time of crisis and somehow we manage to emerge the stronger one. Like a tigress protecting her cubs. Havnt we all experienced this? Koi mere bachche ke bare mein kuch bol ke to dekhe. Zubaan kheench loongi!!

P and her cousin were dressing up their soft toys with make up and shoes made out of the shiny tapes…. you know those plastic kind of shiny tapes which look like wrapping paper? They cut up parts and put it on the cheeks and forehead as make up and wound it around their hands and feet for shoes and gloves! But that’s not all … A did the same…. to herself!

She bullied the nanny into cutting up pieces of that tape and stick it on her face and wrists and feet! And if we tried to take it off she would start crying 😭 OMG it was a sight!

Kids can do the funniest things. They are so innocent and free from inhibitions. Unfortunately as they grow older they start getting conscious and embarrassed by certain things. Watch what you are saying or watch what you are doing. It would be so awesome if everyone had a free mind like them and just LIVED! Enjoy life and do what you feel like. Who cares what others think! Wouldn’t that make us more satisfied at the end of our journey? Rather than regret what if I had done this or what if I had listened to myself and not so and so. 

I have been trying to sort out the toys slowly for the past 1.5 weeks. Little by little.  (Had the 4 day break in the middle 😁) I still have P’s books to sort. There are story books and colouring books( many of which she hasn’t finished)and  activity books and knowledge books. The list is endless. And so is her stock. The shelves are so stuffed now that any new book has to be kept on top, not inside!

The toys are sorted…. and man were there a little too many. I think we just overindulge our kids now a days. Multiple boxes full of crayons. 3 boxes of colour pencils. 3 sets of sketch pens. My God! I was amazed at the amount of stuff I got out of there. So I just followed one strategy. Anything she hasn’t touched for more than 6 months is out. Whether it’s a game or stationery or activity books. My poor A has no space! 80% of the space is taken up by P’s stuff. And for A’s stuff I have had to buy those huge bins. Every time I give my maid something to keep in their room she is like “bhabhi mein kahan rakhoon?” I just give her a glance and say “jahan jagah mile wahan rakh de” I had been avoiding this for a long time but now I think we had reached the limit. Every single shelf was overflowing and even above the shelves whatever space was there was filled. So I pledged to myself that once I’m done with the cleaning this time, I won’t leave a single thing on top of the shelves and I will leave some empty spaces on the shelves.

We live in the age of bounty. You name it and our kids have it. Why do they need so much stuff? They don’t even touch it after playing once or twice. What about all those kids out there who don’t even get a single square meal forget a decent toy? It makes you think…. why am I wasting so much money. Mine and others’. A big reason for so much stuff is the amount of gifts our kids get now a days. I remember we always got cash or chocolates as gifts (not that chocolates are a favoured gift for me). The cash was deposited in the bank and that generated more cash. Isn’t that more helpful than giving stuff which the child doesn’t even need?

For the past 2 birthdays (my daughters have their birthdays just one day apart so it’s been celebrated together) I have made it a point to make it clear to people that I will not be accepting gifts. I accept donations for the NGO I am associated with. At least P understands now that instead of receiving stuff we really don’t need, we can give food and nutrition to poor children who are fighting the deadly cancer.

There is another reason too…. trust me it reduces so much trash in your house. I have realised that half the things people give are not usable. Some are duplicate. Clothes don’t fit. And what we do use only adds to the STUFF. So by doing this I am actually doing ek teer se do nishane 😁

There is also an amazing way to give away the stuff that our kids are not using. There is an NGO called Aasman foundation. They have this annual event where they take donations of toys and other stuff and create a market for children from the slums. They give them fake money and let them shop what they like. I like to donate my stuff there. Sharing a flyer if anyone would be interested too

We spent the last weekend in Chikmagalur. What an absolutely amazing place. Green hills till where the eyes can see. We were literally in the clouds the morning we left. It felt like a little piece of heaven. On the way back we decided to stop at Halebidu and Belur.

At first I felt P might be to young to enjoy the place. I had never taken her to a historical place before (well we have been to the Taj Mahal just last month and she loved it). But this is different. More history to it. Definitely centuries older than the Taj. These temples were built by the Hoysala dynasty almost 900 years ago!! Yes! 900!! They are still so well preserved. 

So we thought just quick guided tours will be enough and we shall complete it within a couple of hours and be on the way back. But I was in for a bit of a surprise. P was absolutely in love with them. She listened to guide talk about each statue carefully. And even observed that Halebidu had been plundered more than Belur. First the Muslim invasion and then out of 74, 70 statues had been taken out by the British and are now a part of the Victoria and Albert museum in London. And was she upset about that!!

She asked so many questions. Which temple is older ?Why did the muslims break it? How did they break it? Why did the British take so many things from here? Did the king live here? Where did the king live? (Halebidu had a palace half a kilometre away which was completely destroyed by the muslims) why did they break down the palace? She wanted to know everything. She even took plenty of pictures from my phone coz she was so awe struck by the structures. I was amazed to see how a 7 year old can be so interested in such a place. ( the pics below are taken by her) maybe I just underestimated her curiosity. 

Btw… I left A with her grandparents. It would have been impossible to see even half the place properly had she been with me.”Mamma godi” would have been the permanent demand and I would land up carrying her around and breaking my back. And just as I decided that I’m going to drive the car now (I never get to drive on the highway 😕) I got a call that she wants to shift to my car. And there went all my dreams of driving on the super smooth traffic free road. And then I asked her can mamma drive the car…. she said Fufa is driving na. 🙄 kya zamana aa gaya hai. 2 saal ki beti se permission leni pad rahi hai. I knew it would be futile to try and drive coz she would cry and want to come in my lap. So I had to give up the thought. Yet another time when you give up something so your child can be happy….. does this ever end for mommies????

We’ve been in partial heaven for the past 3 days. Absolutely wonderful place. Peaceful, calm, and atop a mountain…. which is my favourite place to be. I love mountains! It’s been an up and down with the kids. Sleep schedules gone for a toss, meals not eaten , milk not drunk….. but I care less. I’m on HOLIDAY! 

The place we are staying at is on the slopes of a mountain and the space outside our villa is a small garden with a few huge rocks strewn around. At this very moment I’m sitting on top of one the rocks and writing this post. It’s simply amazing. It’s so silent I can hear the kids playing in the other villa. They are enjoying a nice bubble bath in their grandparents room. The tub here is a mini swimming pool 😀

Like I said outside our room there a few rocks and the kids are having a wonderful time climbing them. They found a small playing space on top of a few rocks. Took a sheet and sat on top playing pictionary. Another place they climbed up the rocks more than a floor high and it was like a mini mountain climbing experience. The kids are simply thrilled to be here. 

At first I was not very comfortable with P climbing up those rocks. Kept thinking in my mind what if she slips and falls. Then slowly as she kept doing it and got more comfortable… even I gave in. I just let them be. Have fun. Do what you like. 

Sometimes we put our fears into our children. I definitely would not be able to climb that mini mountain. But why should I put that fear in my child. Let her be. If she is not comfortable doing it, she won’t. But I should not stop her from doing what she is enjoying. Let her have her own favourites and inhibitions. ( in the process we have a pair of torn leggings at the bum and a muddy stained t shirt and not to mention the brand new minion crocs with hundreds of scratches and muddy stains 🙄 I’m trying not think about them)